Back in the realm of living

After a never-ending flu, which I genuinely believed was going to kill me (I’ve never been this sick as an adult), I’m back in the realm of the living. I still have a bit of a cough, but wow — that was exhausting.

Physically and mentally draining. Not a good start to the year at all, but it’s over. I’m definitely feeling better today, and my mental capacity is almost back.

It feels so good not to feel unwell. I’m honestly just grateful that I can breathe normally again.

So far, nothing this year has gone according to plan or expectations. But now that I’m feeling better, I’m full of hope that the worst is behind me. It can be a great year — so keep your fingers crossed for me, because I can’t wait for spring and what it brings 🌱

and I'm glad you're back, it's a little highlight! 

I started reading a book which took over, even though it’s the weirdest thing I’ve read. It starts as a school adventure for about 100 chapters, but then suddenly turns into a sort of p-0-rn story with a big O, lol. I mean, the storyline is great, but that was so unexpected. It's about polygamous relationships of teenagers in a fantasy world, all is well justified, but still the fact that you just start liking the characters and then stop judging at all..  scares how much you can end up justifying hahah

but on the side note, I like fantasy stories in different worlds, it's a nice escape

https://novelbin.com/b/defy-the-alphas/chapter-1-special-skills

I am open to all good things arriving that year!

I had a lot of time to think recently, and as an overthinker, it's not a great place to be. I would rather be busy. thoughts:

- Life is unpredictable

- people are unpredictable

- I'm so predictable lol 

- things I'm running from are the ones that haunt me 

- things that I chase are those I never truly get

Should I change my approach and just start doing everything I can to NOT get what I want, then it will come as a golden rainfall? hahahah maybe that's the clue 

This year I wanna focus only focus on

GYM and GUITAR, 

and maybe being clever with savings, and having loads of fun, joy and sun 

also having loads of good human interactions, the quality once 

AND BTW I realised I crave DEEPNESS
nothing shallow is fulfilling me 

Deep conversations

Deep connections

Deep soul dive whatever it means :D