the otherside

 I will start this post now in hope I gonna finish it later, but today morning its the moment I should post it

I did it in the name of what I don't know

But it took some part of weight from me
It also added some weight 

What's next?

I also need a normal holidays 
I deeply understood that you are alone in this world
You shouldn't be placing hope in anyway in other people bc it's gonna be only huge disappointment 

so
be the hero of your own story 

But at the same time I'm a human and I've got feelings
And that's very disappointing when you realise that there in no one who truly cares about

or almost no one

and the people who you would like them to care, they won't care

 an to see people you care going wrong way

not being able to mange their own shit so they struggle

but i can't bear the world on my arms

I'm barely handling my own things

I'll have for more migraines and a neck pain, few days will be more sad, and then I will be back to be in my rhythm, the cog in the machine of life again

There is no place where I would like to be right now. 

There is nowhere I would say I wanna be there

why did I start travel in the first place, could my life go different way and I would like it? Or I am meant to be the crazy spirit, always searching for 'the place'